Feel the Music

I just wanted to share something about me and my kids. We can be very goofy. I like to goof around and have fun with them. I love it when we get to laughing so hard we are crying. The older they get, the more we are like this. I loved it when they were little, but now they are like people. I know that sounds weird, but they have personalities now. They also make me feel younger. Since I have a teenager that is about to be 17, he takes me back. I have always loved music. I love the 80's, which I grew up in, I love the heavy metal hair bands, I love Christian rock, and I still love the techno, rave or dance music as some people call it. Derek, (my teenager) takes after me about music. I listen to music in the bathroom when I am getting ready, I am always listening to music in the car, when I am cleaning the house, whenever I work out at the gym with my ipod, any where possible. We even had speakers built into our living room walls for the surround sound and of course my music, and had speakers built into our patio, so I can listen to music on my swing. So you get the idea.

Anyway, me and the kids like to jam in the car. And we listen to it loud. Which would explain why I am partially deaf in my right ear. Derek is always finding music on itunes and lets me see if I like it. He listens to some stuff I cannot stand (you know the screaming crap) but most of it I like. And its funny when he comes across a song from the 80's that was redone by some group he listens to.

Today we went out to eat with some friends. Me and the kids went out to the car while Sean was paying and saying goodbye. Derek found some music the other day that is called dance, but it could be techno or rave music. It really makes you want to dance. So today while we were waiting in the car, we were singing and dancing in the car. I can only imagine what people thought. Loud music blaring from the car and the car shaking. And when Sean finally comes out and sees the car, he starts smiling and shaking his head. I think he thinks we are crazy. I love to dance too. And am getting Derek to dance. I will start dancing around the house when ever I can.

So my little life lesson for today is this: Feel the music and dance whenever possible. It makes me feel young again and makes me feel good whenever I am down. I cannot imagine life without it.

Anniversary

Today is my anniversary. I have been married to my awesome husband for 18 years now. I love him so much more than the day we got married. And I love him for so many things. We had only dated for about 5 months total when we got married. And we lived together (sorry mom) for about a month before we married. We have been through alot together. He allowed me to quit my job shortly after we were married because I hated it. And didn't expect me to get another one. Then, 6 months after we married, I found out I was pregnant. Derek was born on Sean's birthday (which is also Sean's mothers birthday). Then 3 months later Sean's grandfather died, and 3 months to the day, Sean's dad died. It was a rough year. Not only were we newly weds still, in my opinion, but to have all this happen so close together made life interesting. Sean went through a tough time dealing with all the deaths and all that that entails, but I also went through a tough time because I didn't really have a husband. The grief he went through was hard to watch. Things got better, and then we had Christopher 5 years and 5 days after Derek. Christopher's actual due date was the same as Derek's birthday. I could have had him on the same day because I was having a scheduled c-section, but I thought that 3 people in the same family on one birthday was enough. Having my second child was a hard adjustment. Derek and I lived by Sean's work schedule. (He worked at the Olive Garden) But Derek was going to start school soon, and now 2 kids was hard for me to function. But I finally got the hang of it and we made it. Sean started studying computers with a friend, and was able to get a job at Hastings Corporate office. Hanna was born almost 4 years after Christopher. Almost a year after having Hanna I got a job. Or rather it got me. I didn't go looking for it. I was approached about it and decided to take a job as a preschool teacher. And am still working there today. I lost my dad to heart problems almost 2 years ago. I am now looking to go back to school at almost 40, not exactly sure what I want to be, but I will figure it out when the time is right. But looking back over all these years, Sean and I have been through a lot together. There is more that I didn't right about, just because its more personal, but I am amazed how far we have come. I am so thankful that God put Sean in my life and we have chosen to make it work for a lifetime. I could not have made it without his support and love and understanding and forgiveness. I have had my moments in life that weren't easy for him to deal with, and vice versa, but I am so happy we have stuck it out together. I know that marriage is difficult, but wouldn't change a thing. All of this has made me who I am. I have made mistakes, and still will, but I just try harder every day. Ok, most days I try harder, some I just don't want to. Sean has supported me and the kids the whole time. We have struggled most of our married life, but we both wanted me to be a stay at home mom and were willing to make the sacrifices for this. Sean eventually went out on his own and we have finally been able to buy a house last year. God has blessed us in so many ways. Its amazing how He turns the bad into good. We still struggle, but I am getting used to it. Its just a part of life. But I don't want my life to ever be without Sean. He is my rock. He always helps me see that everything will be fine even when I am totally freaking out. And yes, that's one of my little secrets, I freak out. I love you so much Sean and thank you for always being there for me and the kids. Happy Anniversary!!!!!!!!!!!!!!